Episode VI: A Cancer Within A Breast
Driving into the Cancer Institute was like driving into a private school campus. Beautifully landscaped, gorgeous buildings, and even a lovely water feature with a bridge. As I walked through the lovely cancer oasis, I thought I will be purchasing at least a new tree or two.
Only one tiny section of a very nice facility.
When I actually entered the building, I had to try and figure out where to go. The office was big and most people, "the regulars", knew the procedures and desks they were suppose to go to. I was new, so I had to ask a lot of people what to do and where to go next.
After I found the main desk, I checked in and paid my co-pay. Then I was directed to a lab area were I had to check in again and wait patiently for my blood to be drawn. I was called back where the nurse have to confirm my birthday. I verified I was myself and they also verified I was me. The lady who drew the blood was amazingly good. Since it was clear that all they do all day was draw blood - it showed in their handy work. The stick was painless and the 6-8 vials of blood taken where not even missed. Once she finished taping up my arm, I had no idea where to go. I asked the nurse what I was supposed to do and she said I was to wait in front of the door with my doctor's name on it. Simple enough!
Eine Kleine Nachtmusik, Dorothea Tanning
The entire front lobby was essentially doors into the cancer zone. So, the hubby and I waited patiently in front of a door. Once called, I got weighed and my blood pressure was taken. We briefly spoke about my current medications, but primarily we waited on the Oncologist.
He repeated information I already knew from the breast surgeon meeting, which was the basic you have cancer. Basically, that meeting was to schedule multiple tests (PET & Cardiologist) to make sure that the cancer was isolated and that my heart was alright. The PET Scan was scheduled for the next day. The cardiologist was harder to schedule, so they could not see me until the following week on Tuesday. Meaning that my next Oncology appointment to answer all of these things would be next Wednesday!
The appointment was very brief. Almost too brief, it made me wonder if he was really looking at those tests and results I had completed. Of course, the only thing we really discussed was that I needed more tests. So, I realized he was just trying to wait until he got more information before giving me options, answers, or general information.
In my head...
There was so much information, but also so little. I understood I have cancer, but until they do more tests I don't really know much. I did not have any real answers for people around me, who want them, but I wanted to make sure that I have enough information to make the best decision.
So, I am playing musical doctors. In one doctor's office... and repeat.
"I know God won't give me anything I can't handle.
I just wish he didn't trust me so much."
I just wish he didn't trust me so much."
- Mother Teresa
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